Another edition of...KIDS SAY THE DARNEDEST THINGS

A cumulative edition from the last 6 months or so....

On a recent road trip, Riley suddenly started repeatedly yelling out in a sing-song tone, "chicken nuggets, chicken nuggets, chicken nuggets". We all giggled, and then she yelled "roni and cheese, roni and cheese." Adam said, "Why are you yelling out all your favorite foods?"--(short pause)--"Because you are the queen of random?", he answered himself. Conor pipes up from the backseat: "Because she's the queen of yummy!!"


(I may have already posted this one...)
Conor: Dad, why do you always wear shorts?
Dad: These are boxer shorts
Conor:  Oh......(long thoughtful pause)......................they don't box, though, do they?

Conor: Is this a clothespin?
Me: Yes
Conor: What do you close with it?

One morning Conor described a dream he had had the night before..."Dad was Spiderman and he was fighting Doc Oc (one of the bad guys in the Spiderman series apparently). Then Dad put webs in my mouth and I became Spiderkid.

At the park one day we were playing restaurant. Conor would pretend to serve me some food, and I would pretend to sit and eat it. After a while, he ran off to play on another part of the playground. I yelled, "Hey, wait, when am I going to get my food?" He answered, "I am going on a 3 week vacation. Riley's the one that will be restauranting you."

This poster at school is pretty self-explanatory. Scan down to Conor's answer for "Jobs our Parents Do".

Grandpa: Look at those birds.

Conor: What shape are they flying in? It looks like a "v"... no actually (pause) it's a lower case "y".

Conor wanted to stay home while Adam and I planned to go run some errands. He suggested that Grandpa babysit, but I reminded him that Grandma was gone. I said, "Are you sure? You and Riley would probably tie him up and put him in the closet." He answered, "I can't even tie yet!" I said "Oh, ok, well I still don't know" (drawing it out dramatically). So Conor answers confidently, "Grandpa could handle us both at once."


Ok, I guess some of these go back a little farther...I've been adding to this page instead of just publishing each funny story one by one.

When living with my parents, we pulled out a lot of old books and toys from when I was a child. At one point, Conor found an old book with one of the pages ripped. Thinking it was one of my destructive children, I asked Conor "Who did that?" He was sure as he said, "It must have been Laura." When I asked why, he aswered, "Because she was the littlest."

As Riley's vocabulary has been expanding, Conor has been trying to help teach her the correct way to say certain words. Early on, she would pronounce Grandpa as "Gappa". Conor kept trying to correct her, but finally gave up and said, "Yeah, that's Grandpa...just without the 'r' ".

Oh boy, these are from December last year!!...

At Christmastime, we were visited by the Elf on the Shelf, a character who visits our house every day between Thanksgiving and Christmas to watch the kids, and report back to Santa overnight, returning to a new hiding spot every morning. My mom has several fake trees in her living room, along with the real Christmas tree, and these were some of our elf's favorite places to hide. One morning, Conor said "That elf is always hiding on trees." I answered, "Why do you think he is always in the trees? He must like them." Conor said, "No, it's because he is a Christmas elf!"

As we were approaching Christmas Day, we were guessing how many gifts each family member had under the tree. Conor piped up: "I think I have 17 presents. I can feel it. I can feel it in my heart."

Conor: I wish it was Christmas or Christmas Eve every day.
Me: Why?
Conor: So we could play in the snow and have presents.
Me: What about summer? and swimming?
Conor: Ok, I don't really like that idea anymore.